On this day, I always celebrate the birth of my oldest child, Kadin. Kadin was 5 weeks early and born after I had a partial abruption. He was teeny tiny and such a watcher. He was a horrible sleeper, nursed every hour and a half for an hour until he was 7 months old. He did not sleep through the night until he was in kindergarten. I was a zombie for the first year of his life. But other than sleep, he was the perfect child. He met all developmental milestones early. He talked in complete sentences by the time he was 18 months. He could read people's personalities better than a fortune teller. He was not loud, did not like messes, stayed where you put him, quietly played for hours, and loved me to pieces. He spoiled us for our future children.
At the same time, I am thankful for those other children. The ones who needed time out. Who were more difficult to potty train. Who talk back. Who have their own minds and aren't afraid to march to their own drummer. They have enriched our lives in other ways.
This year I am also thankful for my friends who have fought cancer before me. I am thankful for their sweet cards, their emails, their timely prayers.....oh for so many things! I am thankful God has surrounded me with people who's arms give comfort with no words. I can't believe there was this huge group of people I never knew in my life. Or I did know, but I didn't know in this capacity. I'm forever thankful that so many have reached out to me, and I hope to do the same.
I wouldn't say I'm more thankful this year than other years, because we have had some amazing things happen in our lives to be thankful for. But this year I am more aware of my thankfulness in the little every day things. I'm thankful to be able to hold my children close, to write letters to friends, to worship a big God, and for answered prayers every day. I am thankful to be able to walk to the mailbox and feel the wind in my face. To wave my arms over my head. To be out of bed. I am thankful that I get to brush my hair. That I get to keep it in the first place. I am thankful for a body who may be weakened, but hasn't let me down. I'm thankful I"m able to tie my shoes. I'm thankful that I have a warm coat that I can bend my arms to put on. I'm thankful for modern medicine and advancements. I'm thankful for life and healing.
And at night, in the darkest part where bad thoughts can drift in and you can feel vulnerable, I am thankful for every person who uttered a prayer for my family. For my health. For ME. Because I cannot repay that action, I can only repeat it. And so I do. Thankfully. Every day.
What are you thankful for? What do you see when you look at your own life? There are so many blessings we let pass us by. I'm determined to not do that any more. As much as I can anyway. I want to be aware of the good things all around me, every day, even in the bad times. I want God to know I see Him in all things. And I want to focus on those things. Rejoice in the little things.
Like tiny little 5 lb baby boys born in red wine amniotic fluid who should not have made it, but did. I'm so very thankful for that! Happy Birthday, sweet boy!
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